But then again it was so much worse than I have seen personally that it helped me see how relating to people with that mental disease can be harder than I realized to work with. Anyway, interesting show and interesting disease.
Watched Tangled and enjoyed the alterations to the Rapunzel story more than I expected to. Now I'm watching lots of Futurama to chill out. Setting up Will's new phone later and enjoying my good moments until then. He's having some problems adjusting his sleep schedule and I'm concerned he's having depression issues, but he's definitely trying harder than anybody else I've had move in since Erica left and he knows he has to fulfill his duties. He's good as a roommate and I want to see us succeed in creating a happy shared space.
My mushroom box is gorgeous and I'm excited to use them for a nice stir-fry. The salad greens and herbs are getting used which I continue to find awesome. The freezer and fridge are doing better and it's neat that I could fix the OXO dish cleaning brush with an inexpensive brush head replacement. I'm happy to get the kitchen cleaned up - the shelving unit has helped us organize and it looks full but makes it look a little cramped.
And now I think I'm going to cheer myself up by focusing more on Futurama. Tomorrow I see my pain specialist. I hope it goes well with Will and he does get how to interact with my doctors. It's one of the last concerns I have.
Having my pets surrounding me, asleep, on my bed, just feels so freaking pleasant. Especially with Petal feeling family enough to sleep under a Blankie by me feet and by Femme Pois or Lolita (not Ein so much).
There's so much I need to do so far as organizing my papers and things. It completely overwhelms me but I've been trying to make sure to take short bursts of energy and use them to get such things as can get done, done.
I have a couple of long time crushes that peered from my mental backburners. I tend to ignore those feelings, but with things seeming to work with Will I guess I feel as though I can let some of me peer out from my secured shell. Turtle Molly, that's me.
This weekend may have done damage though it shouldn't have. But what things start as they don't necessarily end up as.
The real need in me for stability and comprehension that could bring an even greater stability I don't hide in the least.
Will Will work out? I certainly have that impression and there remains hope as he has a very relaxed manner which helps and goes far toward making life really laid back, so I don't fight the positive aspects.
The unconditional love from my pets has my depression slightly eased. And it's time to put this down and call Ein up to sleep with FP and me. And whichever cats choose to join us.
Petal has taken to me and in such a way that I feel honored. Roll
Life has kept me busy, not just physically. The strain and stress has kept me fairly knackered consistently.
Will seems to be working out and that continues to not only make life easier, but there seems to me that we have a good socialization setup set up. Most times he's off on his own, but we meet up and discuss things about once a day. Once a day gives us each plenty of alone time as well as still having us slowly get used to our need to keep in touch regarding all the necessary doctor visits and medications etc.
But I need to ease myself back a bit in order to make certain I don't wear myself too far down again.
Right now I'm missing my best friends company. It keeps feeling as though I should recognize the end to a one sided concern. It feels as if this ends NOW.
Fresh loaf of Italian bread with fresh crushed garlic and basil to go with a stew made by new roommate Will utilizing all sorts of veggies, broth, and basically yummy stuff so the fridge is getting cleared out.
The apartment has started feeling a bit homey. Michael's gone and that makes me sad, but Will feels like he's going to make a good roomie AND assistant which we can develop to a good roommate situation that will create a healthy life.
--> So I put this aside to go watch The Muppets with Will and had a really good night discussing things and eating freshly baked bread with fresh veggie stew only to just now get a psychotic email from a past psycho and my response as an open message follows <-->
Like mouldy hate filled bloody bile mushrooms an email exploded like a piece of firey rock hard shite from somebody I used to know. Every so often he crawls out from where ever he's hidden himself in order to act like a dementia patient with Tourette's. Or however it's spelled. The problem is it's so vicious because of 20-years ago issues still traumatizing him. My health collapse and steroid caused weight gain has him crowing with joy at my fat ugly 42 year old self. And he just sounds pathetic and I don't feel either so ugly or fat for a bit because of him now.
That's a thing I'm glad I don't get off on because it's so incredibly sad and pathetic. There's naught to do but stay away because there's no rational discussion possible. Poison and Bile. Two substances it's best to steer clear of if at all possible. It's okay to feel bad about aspects but minimal as possible as it's best that way...