Pathetic
Today I had too many chores and I'm ashamed to say that it's fine to say I need a lawyer to assist me in my divorce but I don't have the money and I'm having to trust promises. So I'm laying here in severe pain, wishing I had remembered to ask Candice to give me a steroid booster shot before she passed out.
The night sweats are increasing as is the stabbing pain in my stomach. I'm laying in bed just wishing this would ease up even a small bit. To be blunt: today was fairly horrid and I can't take too many of them before full adrenal crisis occurs. Candice apologized for her part in it and I of course accepted and apologized in turn. But I'm still rocked by it to an extent that is physical.
Minnie, the new pup in town, has started to fit in to the house. Tonight she even came into my room and jumped up on not only the chair, but also my bed! Shocking actually. I think them all going on walks together helps and maybe the fact the five of us went on the walk to the notary helped her see how she fits in.
The combination of tears pouring down coupled with a semi-serious dehydration feeling occurring just lies under the stabbing pain in which I'm surrounded. Luckily I spent a ridiculous amount on new edibles from the medicinal shop Candice and her paying charge usually visit.
I've got medicinal honey for tea and garlic butter for light sauté since they have actual measures. We have a plan to eat some medicinal pizza, followed by a homemade double creme Brie with caramelized onions and lightly sautèed crimini and baby Bella mushrooms. An old favorite of mine to make with people. Savory medicinals are wonderful.
A large slug of Nystatin to help combat the candida attack in my mouth and esophagus. I want the pain to ease up. I want to just rest and recover. Need to see my therapist, the first Candice of the two in my current life. Need that and some other things. I feel so lost and drowning in this state.
On a plus side, I may have a financial boost that's enough to go down either one of the two very different paths I've got in my mind as possibilities. That doesn't help in any way except in the hope it offers.
