Posterous theme by Cory Watilo

We Do What We Can With The Little We Have

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Today is a day that has me thinking too much about things causing sadness deep in me. To call what I'm feeling anything less than direly dour (or do I mean dourly dire?) makes light of something deeply destructive in the self.

Erica spent last night over to assist me and now I'm alone again. Snow Toe arrives on Saturday. I had Safeway deliver today. Slowly the home is gaining things to make life easier. A new vacuum that sucked up enough hair in my tiny available floor space to fill the canister. Ordered a small heavy duty step ladder for the kitchen which Erica mentioned I should have gotten quite some time ago. The home needs work to make space and show how open the floor plan really is.

The pets, all three, are asleep at my feet. I took a bunch of pictures to try and show them all in their row. They follow me from room to room so I tend lately to try and spend time in both rooms. It's made me aware of the couch and now I want it gone. Want to get rid of it to see about the recliner love seat there instead. Maybe the chaise lounge next to it...it's not clear to me what I should do, but I know that cleaning everything up and getting organized is near the forefront of my desires.

There is a need in me to clear up the mess and to find a suitable home. And maybe mom is right and I should try again to find out about an assisted living home that accepts under 55 that's not only a year remaining to look at. But the pets wouldn't be allowed. Buying a small house is possible if I go about it smartly. Staying here and getting a one story home with a small yard for the dogs makes good sense if I am careful.

Sigh. Nausea and acid stomach equals misery. Another big sigh.